First Look Gnomes
Two Dad's doing Silly Things.
Everyone wants to learn something new, but only some people want to sit down and read a bunch of nonsense - so why not listen to some instead? Chuck in some random facts and a couple of Dad jokes, and you'll be full of (potentially useless) knowledge in no time.
Whether all of it is true is part of the gnomery.
Join Cornishman "Walliams" in the shed at the bottom of his garden in Cornwall and Wulfrunian (a man from Wolverhampton apparently) "Mr Hodgkiss" from Belfast as they take a "first look" at the relatively unknown, learn some stuff and chat about life as Parents.
Dive into the First Look Gnome Universe every month and learn about random things you didn't even know you wanted to learn about! Fill some of your day with something interesting, engaging, and funny.
Welcome to the bottom of the garden.......'But what about the Gnomes?' I hear you cry!
Good things come to gnomes who wait. And ones that rate, review and subscribe :)
First Look Gnomes
Bananas, Beers, and Baby Jake Adventures
Ever wondered if an AI could outshine Shakespeare in the poetry department? Well, we put it to the test .....
This episode is a tapestry of laughter and nostalgia, from the art of crafting poems with a technological co-pilot, to the absurdity of British beer names – and yes, we've got a pint of 'Piddle' in hand to prove it. We're your friendly neighbourhood gnomes, conjuring up verbal spells and raising our glasses to the weekend vibes that make every recording session a treasure trove of giggles and jest.
Have you ever marked a personal milestone by peeling a banana? That's exactly what happened in one of our conversations.
Join us for a jaunt along the picturesque North Cornwall coast, complete with a furry companion and the infamous scone debate – because whether cream or jam comes first, it's a matter of delicious importance.
As we wrap up, we venture into the curious world of children's television, where the surreal escapades of Baby Jake become a springboard for our own zany show ideas. But it's not all fun and games; we also take a moment to respond to our listeners' heartfelt dilemmas, offering fatherly advice and sporting predictions with our signature blend of humour and sincerity. So settle in for an episode that's as comforting as a family gathering, as surprising as an unexpected fact, and as rich in character as the cosiest Cornish cream tea...
Join us at the bottom of the garden for a first look at... ,
- Copilot AI ,
- Piddle - Dorset Amber Ale (Thirsty Thirst),
- Peeling a Banana ,
- Dad Injuries ,
- Marsland mouth ,
- Baby Jake ,
- Projectors (Tips for Dads) ,
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In the realm of sound when stories abound. The first little gnomes have again been found With voices in harmony, like a melodious fix. They've spun tales anew In season two, episode six, from the very first season when roots took hold, to the current chapters. Stories bold and told. Each gnome in the cast of the magical mix brings life to the airwaves with the audio tricks. Season two unfolds a tapestry so rich with gnomes at the helm, without a single glitch. Episode six arrives a new chapter a In the book of the podcast, their enchantment chance fix. Here's the gnomes in their podcast in Maine. May their episodes continue. A wondrous campaign, for in each segment there's a magical fix, especially now in season two, episode six.
Speaker 2:Bravo, williams, bravo. I wasn't expecting a poem, I'm not gonna lie.
Speaker 1:I enjoyed that a little poem, and that was your first. That was my first look at. Well, I had my first look at co-pilot, which is again another ai um oh, hang on a minute. You didn't write that yourself oh, I mean, I mean um, uh co-pilot I I was literally giving you.
Speaker 2:I was about to get that on my hands and knees and start kind of bowing at your feet. That's a lot of effort.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, that was AI. Sorry, that was AI. Um yeah, co-pilot, I couldn't think of what to do with the little start, so I thought create a little poem.
Speaker 2:It was a very nice little poem too, um poem. So it was a very nice little poem too. Um, similar to me. Wells, the ai thing, it's, it's both. We've talked about it doing season one, I believe we talked about ai a lot and chat, gbt and all that kind of stuff. It does have its, it does have its uses, there's no doubt about it. Um, poetry, for the introduction to the podcast is one I would never it's, it's an application I would never thought of, but it was brilliant.
Speaker 1:So bravo to uh co-pilot um, how you been, how you been.
Speaker 2:It's, uh, the first time on a saturday recording we are doing a saturday recording because I uh forgot that we were meant to be recording yesterday and people turned up on our door and we started into the beers and, before you knew it, it was like flip, we're meant to be broadcasting. So I apologize, wallymcu, for missing our scheduled appointment, but it's not Saturday.
Speaker 1:Saturdays and Sundays are the strongest days of the week, aren't they?
Speaker 2:The Saturday especially, is just what a day, what a day Saturday is.
Speaker 1:The others are weekdays, aren't they?
Speaker 2:Oh, that's Very good, very good. So it begins listeners, so it begins the bad jokes on a Saturday are just as bad as the Friday.
Speaker 1:They seem to get sick on weekdays as well. Must have a weakened immune system.
Speaker 2:Easier for you to say A weakened immune system Very good. For you to say A weekend immune system Very good.
Speaker 1:Very good.
Speaker 2:Williams, it's nice to see your humour carries over from a Friday to a Saturday.
Speaker 1:Well, it does, it does. I'm going to have a thirsty first.
Speaker 2:A little thirsty first. Please don't crack into it, Wiles. It's K and A. You should get into this.
Speaker 1:This is a little number from Dorset, so I'm going to have a bottle of. I don't know if you can see that that's a terrible name you Cornish ones.
Speaker 2:you love your weird names.
Speaker 1:It's Dorset, it's a Dorset amber ale and it's a bottle of Piddle A bottle of Piddle.
Speaker 2:Who wants to drink a bottle of Piddle?
Speaker 1:And it's only a 4.1%, so I'm looking after the other little one. So none of this 9.2% business.
Speaker 2:That is weaker than your normal Piddle.
Speaker 1:It's got a little label on the back that says Great with Fish and Chips, which I haven't got any. So that's a P. But yeah, piddle 4.1%. What are you waiting for? Join the real air revolution. At the top, the Dorset legend, I think, a beauty crafted in Dorset's Piddle Valley. Very nice, there you go, and, craig, perhaps you want to explain to our American listeners, I guess, what Piddle is.
Speaker 2:Oh yes. So the reason I complained about the name there because Piddle is slang for a wee- it's just Piddle.
Speaker 1:It's Piddle, ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 2:The bottle of Piddle has exploded and gone all over Walliams. I've Piddled everywhere. All over Walliams, I've piddled everywhere. So in random places like Dorset and Cornwall they like to use these kind of slang terms for their beer, but I've never really personally seen the attraction of you know, oh, I'm going to drink a bottle of pish, oh, a bottle of pibble, because it's like, well, why would you call something that is meant to taste nice something associated with pee? But you know what? It's British humour. And yeah, I'm sorry listeners, I'm just watching Wadim's trying to clean up his Piddle, his puddle of Piddle, his Piddle. His glass isn't as full as it should have been because most of it went on the floor, but, uh, he has now drank. You know what?
Speaker 1:I can imagine fish and chips just go. Well, we've lost his sound we can't hear him.
Speaker 2:Oh no, hello, um, but he, he's. I will explain. Oh yes, your face was saying, oh, this is I'm gonna. I'm gonna interpret what I think you said about your pivul. It was a lovely pivul that. Oh, it tastes, it's fresh and fruity, and oh, it's not too strong, it's going down.
Speaker 1:I was saying it does get and this would be a typical Kaurish saying, but it would actually go well with fish and chips.
Speaker 2:Piss and fish and chips, fish and chips, fish and chips. Well, you enjoy your piddle, wallym, so you enjoy it. Grab your rod. I've grabbed it. It's covered in piddle.
Speaker 1:What's your tackle of choice?
Speaker 2:My tackle of choice is a maggot.
Speaker 1:Mine's a little worm, oh a little worm. Do you know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Speaker 2:What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, walliams, yeah.
Speaker 1:Half a worm.
Speaker 2:Classic Classic.
Speaker 1:Anyways, we've got new listeners in. People still listen. I don't know why, but people still listen. We've got new listeners in. People still listen. I don't know why, but people still listen. We've got new listeners um in victorville, california. I like california, nice, cam loops, british columbia, a lovely part of the world um, and bradford, nice. Well welcome and Bradford.
Speaker 2:Nice, Well welcome California, Kamloops and Bradford. Oh, and Deventer Overjizzle, Of course, Deventer Overjizzle, which?
Speaker 1:is in the Netherlands. Say it again, it's Deventer in Overjizzle, overjizzle, the region of Overjizzle, o-v-e-r-i-j-s-s-e-l.
Speaker 2:I mean like, if Snoop Dogg doesn't go and do something there, I'd be very surprised.
Speaker 1:Overjizzle, minizzle. Overjizzle for shizzle.
Speaker 2:Welcome over-jizzle-manizzle. Over-jizzle for shizzle. Welcome over-jizzle.
Speaker 1:Welcome new listeners we've got one listener right in, let's hear it. Feedback and also a word of advice. Oh dear, listening to the First Look Nomes podcast whilst in the gym will result in some very odd looks I am that I am that weirdo laughing to myself whilst pretending to work out.
Speaker 1:Also, I feel like the know-it-all gnome is getting a hard time. I love him. Yes, in his first appearance when he said he's having a poop, I nearly wet myself. Love your work on your secret podcast, boys. I have caught up with a year's worth in a very short time wow, and do we know who that's from? And that's from my sister ah, brilliant, welcome tams, so how did tams find out about this? Did you tell her we discussed on the last podcast, but common theme.
Speaker 2:Common theme.
Speaker 1:Can't remember what we talked about last time no, the wife, the wife and wife, the wife and wife. But uh, in the end, but yeah, just a reminder, please, yeah, write in email, instagram or whatever five-star, review us and subscribe and what else People do, please.
Speaker 2:Well, thanks, tams as well. I mean a little secret. The know-it-all-known may make an appearance today.
Speaker 1:He might do.
Speaker 2:He's around my house somewhere, so he may well make an appearance at the end of the episode, so stick around.
Speaker 1:Yeah, 40% of our listeners are from Spotify, so I don't know you use Spotify, craig. Do you know how to use Spotify? Yes, I do, do you like?
Speaker 2:follow. What do you do? I do so. It's exactly the same so Spotify. You can effectively just I do so in it's exactly the same so Spotify. You can effectively just go into your search bar. In Spotify, you can search for first look gnomes. Um, I will do it exact as we're doing it now. First look gnomes. We are the first thing that comes up. You click into it.
Speaker 1:I'm already following the first thing that comes up for first look names.
Speaker 2:We are, because nobody else would call that. We have five five-star reviews, hey more five-star reviews.
Speaker 1:please More five-star reviews.
Speaker 2:We have no bad reviews on Spotify. That's good, and there is a trader there and you just can follow us, you can subscribe to us, you can set to auto-downloads. We are classed as comedy, education and personal stories. So it says here. So it says to me continue listening to monty don and wolverine join two british dads taking a first look at brewdog. Mr president, buying a house, x-men night. See, actually, sorry guys, I could have just realized what we talked about in the last episode, but coming and looking at it, uh, buying a house, x-men 97, rogues bottom oh yeah, we talked about rogues bottom. New series world. I talked about new series of gardens and drunk. Monty don, please subscribe, help grow the show. See, well, you missed the show grow the show as you need.
Speaker 1:Monty Don to say that for us, help us we're limited to guest speakers, but maybe we'll get Monty Don on we have had Snoop Dogg again.
Speaker 2:Listeners, go listen to the trailer. You'll hear Snoop Dogg talking about our podcast, snoop.
Speaker 1:Doggy first looks first looks. Prepare for your mind to be blown.
Speaker 2:Always is Williams.
Speaker 1:My first work, work, my first.
Speaker 2:My first look is my teeth.
Speaker 1:Let me drink some more piton One second.
Speaker 2:My first.
Speaker 1:My first look this week was Drumroll, please, peeling a banana.
Speaker 2:First look at peeling a banana. Should we start this? Do you want me to go first? First, look at peeling a banana, peeling a banana. Should we start this? Do you want me to go first? First, I've got peeling a banana, peeling a banana. Now I'm going to guess that this isn't. This can't actually be actually genuinely peeling a banana, because you must have had a banana in your 40 years of life at some point and peeled it. No, nope, you've never had a banana. No, no. This is like a book peeling a banana or something Nope. Or a film you've seen. No joke, you've genuinely never had a banana?
Speaker 1:No, because I don't like bananas. So, why would I?
Speaker 2:How do you know you don't like bananas if you've never had one?
Speaker 1:Well, they would have been served in like a dessert or something when I was a kid.
Speaker 2:And you've just decided.
Speaker 1:You didn't like banana, so you've never peeled a banana yeah and now you have yeah, well, I had to because I've been looking after logan and, um, he, he eats anything, and me, being the good dad I am, I, uh, well, actually. So, um, the wifey wife was, um, and she's away this weekend, leaving me in charge, and just to reassure herself, she was going through different things about Logan, things, you know, these are the things he likes to eat, blah, blah, preparing this food, et cetera. And then she just jokingly said well, you do realise how to peel a banana, don't you?
Speaker 2:And I was like you don't, you know what.
Speaker 1:I'm pretty sure I do, but I've never done it. That's mental, that's crazy I could have, potentially. Just I don't know I would have got a knife, chopped it in the middle and then sort of peeled it. That would work. It would work exactly. But there's a For people that don't know. There's the I don't know what it's called the stalk at the end.
Speaker 2:Yeah, where it would have been, where it's attached to the bunch.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you bend it back and then that peels down and then you can peel the other, usually two.
Speaker 2:Well, I'm glad you're explaining to people. I just made a banana, but I'm pretty sure out of our six listeners I'm going to guess again email in firstlooknomes at outlookcom if you haven't. But I'm going to guess most people have peeled a banana and you have to be. But I mean you are right, though it's not as easy as you would think, because if you do that too hard you can then squish the banana, mush banana. So explain more.
Speaker 1:How did you find I don't know how long I can stretch this content.
Speaker 2:I'm intrigued to understand how did it feel from a satisfaction point of view when you did this and you realised it is odd do you not find it? Well, I suppose it is odd because, like, obviously bananas don't grow in the United Kingdom. So when you think about the whole global transport system of fruits, vegetables and other produce, yes, it is mental be the country when the first banana came over well, when was it?
Speaker 2:What is that? I reckon it must have been Waller, I'm going to guess. I'm going to say the first banana was introduced in. When were bananas introduced into the UK? I'm going to go for like 1897. So okay, here we go. Then there's a quiz.
Speaker 1:Do, do, do, do do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do so I guessed 1867 or something around that for the first banana in the UK.
Speaker 2:So England, this is just England, the day bananas made their British debut. So I'll give you some background. It says England got its first glimpse of banana when herbalist, botanist and merchant Thomas Johnson displayed a bunch in his shop in Holborn in the city of London on the 10th of April than it gives us the year.
Speaker 1:So he must have done some exploring.
Speaker 2:Isn't that what I went for? Have you come for exactly the same as I went for? No, you said 67. I may have said 97. I don't know, I can't remember Anyway. Anyway, we're both Completely wrong. 1633 oh, wow, there you go. You know what as well. Do you know what's ridiculous? I should know about this Because in Belfast there is a place Called the Banana Block, which has a history Of bananas, and there they have banana plants, bananas, bananas.
Speaker 2:Well, no, it was the same kind of thing. Someone brought bananas over and they started growing them here, because they were like can we grow bananas in such a ridiculously cold, wet, miserable climate? Can you? And they? Well, yeah, they do.
Speaker 1:Yes, you can, so they can see I didn't realise this would give so much content, but that was the first look at knowing that bananas can grow in belfast I mean under, with, with help from like lights and trees, yeah yeah, the banana trees.
Speaker 2:I've got here indoors, but the banana block, just to give it a shout out, it's a very good venue. They have lots of events there. They banana block in belfast is only down the road and they have uh lovely events they have. There's a big company called float pizza who trade just outside of it. Inside of it they have food vans and they have like mushroom growers. Yeah, it's a great, it's a great social kind of area and uh, yeah, they have a whole history of bananas. So well, I mean that's a great first look. I mean I am, you said, prepared to have your mind blown the first thing. You just just think, no, that can't be true. But if you didn't like bananas from a young age and you never peeled one, I'm glad you've had that experience, you've got to feel what it's like Not until I was 40.
Speaker 1:So you know, life does begin at 40. There's so many new experiences still to come.
Speaker 2:So who knows what's next?
Speaker 1:Peeling an orange.
Speaker 2:You know cutting up a kiwi, having a what You've never peeled an orange. No, don't talk nonsense. You've never peeled an orange.
Speaker 1:No, I was really fussy. Do you just not eat fruit? What do you eat what?
Speaker 2:do you live on Just pasties, just apples, literally an apple and a pasty. I like me. I have for my breakfast a pasty, then I have for my lunch a pasty with some apple, and then for dessert I have me an apple and some beer. Eat more fruit, walliams. It's good for you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I do An apple a day.
Speaker 2:Have you ever cut up a mango?
Speaker 1:But isn't it weird having to peel something to eat it? No, it's so. I know it's the opposite, but it's so unnatural, isn't it?
Speaker 2:No, you know what's unnatural Getting a tin and a tin opener.
Speaker 1:You want to grab it and just eat it.
Speaker 2:What food do you grab and eat? Tell me the food that you grab and eat. Okay, apples, yes, but what other food? The pastries. But they're prepared. So somebody would have had to have unwrapped the butter. And you know, kill a cow, a pasty tree, kill a cow, the pasty tree. The pasty tree is not a real thing, walliams, in Cornwall, they're a very. I mean, you've got to think of the God-given wonder of fruit, right? So an orange goes in a tree, it's got a nice shell Strawberries. Strawberries grow on a plant so they don't really fall off so much.
Speaker 1:But the reason the fruit.
Speaker 2:Blueberries yeah, berries, just berries. In general, you can just eat them, we appreciate that, but they don't fall from a great height. They don't need a protective case.
Speaker 1:Bananas grow high.
Speaker 2:Peel, actually You're so weird, so weird. Eat more fruit, williams. We'll end it on that. Eat more fruit.
Speaker 1:I still surprise you.
Speaker 2:You have all these life experiences left. Oh, what am I going to do? Well, I'm going to go and see the seven wonders of the world. I'm going to go to the top of the tallest building ever. Nope, I'm going to peel an orange. You think you know a guy and you realise he's never been a banana. I've known you for more of my life than I've not known you. We're at that stage now 22 years.
Speaker 1:You didn't know. I can't peel a banana.
Speaker 2:I can, I just peel a banana.
Speaker 1:Well you can, yeah, you can.
Speaker 2:So yeah, 18 years, I didn't know you. 22 years, I have known you. Bloody hell. Anyway, should we move on, let's move on we'll move on from the fruit.
Speaker 2:How can you be that? Uh, well, I can't. There's absolutely no way. I like, yeah, there isn't. There is no way I can beat it. So again, we, we would, we would. If you go on spotify or apple podcasts, you will see the description of this podcast as two dads doing silly things. So, uh, this is a dad. First look, and you'll heard if you listen to recent episodes, and in this one. So you'd have you'd have probably noticed while I'm dropping in there that he has turned 40. Uh, I turned 40 recently too, so we are now 40 year old dads, and my first look is at 40 year old dad injuries. Oh no, oh no, I know what it was. I managed to hurt myself recently.
Speaker 1:You don't back as good at 40 well, you know what.
Speaker 2:It's not that you don't bounce back as easy, it's that you hear these things. You hear people saying as soon as I got to a certain age, I sneezed and dislocated a rib or I I don't know. I bent over to tie my shoelace and then couldn't stand up. I put my back out. I was like you idiots, you need to move more. I had one of these moments, oh no, and I was like what the hell have I done here? Have I done this? What's happened? What did you do to us, fred? So I popped my knee. You popped your knee. Yeah, I actually felt it pop.
Speaker 2:So I was like okay, no, I just, I just literally felt the kneecap come a bit off or something. It was weird it was like it was weird and I managed to kind of push it back in and it wouldn't pop well, like, like, if you just speak, just not not, yeah now I don't actually know if I did, if you can, or if I did genuinely dislocate my knee.
Speaker 2:I have been to see a doctor about it, yeah, and I should have asked him. But I was like, is it okay? Am I going to get a DVT? Is it fine? He gave me some exercises to do for it. But the way I did it so it's the way I did it that is a first look. Not only was I doing something insanely normal, I guess but the pain I was like that's really sore. I was like that's because I'm an old dad now. So my son today went to a bowling party because he's at the age now where they go to bowling parties. So a few weeks ago I was like I better take him bowling to make sure he knows what to do, because, you know, we're getting to the age now where it's like the bumpers are starting to come down and they've got to do it properly.
Speaker 2:They can't just kind of go with the ramp and go like, yeah, well done, you pushed the ball down the ramp, congratulations, no-transcript to. You know, instill the, the technique of bowling, into him. So of course you're like, what's that? What's that? Dad does it and I was bowling superb. So we had a game showed him, we were good, he was getting better, he was really, he was listening, it was engaged, it was fun. Second game, seventh, seventh round of the second game. I was like, right, I'm going to really give this one some welly, I'm going for the. I think I'm on a spare. So I'm thinking, right, I want at least nine, if not a strike here to really big the score up, showing my son, oh yeah, well done, daddy, you're an inspirational father. So I went for it. Whilst I went for it and as I put my left, leg down pop.
Speaker 1:I just went.
Speaker 2:He just went and I was like I bowled a nine and I stood up and I was like oh, that's a good score, that is.
Speaker 1:And as I turned, around, looked at my wife looked at my son.
Speaker 2:I was like, oh shit, what have I done here? Hobbled to the chair and I said to Lesley-Anne and I said to Lesley-Anne I've hurt oh Bab, I think I've hurt my knee and she was like she literally just like pulled her face and went bowling and I was like I was like, yeah, she goes, you're a right mess. She just said to me you're an absolute mess.
Speaker 2:I was like Bab, it's really sore and she goes, you'll be fine, you'll be fine. So after we the next game. Then we were coming to the end of game two and Brandon was like, oh, my hand's getting sore and I said, do you want me to bowl this one for you? He said yeah, yeah. So I take his ball and I hobble over. I'm like, nah, this ain't right, this really, this isn't feeling good at all and went and sat down. He wanted to go in there on the arcade. I sat down and I started rubbing my knee and I kind of pushed it.
Speaker 2:I was like, oh, it's sore there and I just felt it pop back again and I was like, okay, so then it was sore then for a couple of weeks and yeah, it wasn't. It was getting better, but wasn't. I was like I wonder what I've done here. So I went and saw the GP about it and you know, to put a long story short, it was like, yep, you're just at that age where you're going to do stupid things and hurt things.
Speaker 1:So I have I am now in the age.
Speaker 2:Yeah, pretty much I was like, oh, I can't believe this happened. Like I was just bold, I said, yeah, you're kind of at that age. He obviously said some other things, like you know, there's obviously wear and tear and you know, things like that just happen.
Speaker 1:I was like, okay, bowling, so yeah dad, my, my knees were a couple years now, but it kind of stares. It creaks, creaky knees. It makes a creaking sound, just like well.
Speaker 2:I actually I'll give you sorry. I said to the GP about this. I said my knee doesn't the knee that went doesn't creak, but it crunches, it's like, and the GP was 32. He said there's nothing to worry about. He said usually there's no issue there. And he then went through his own personal creaky bits so he did his shoulder. It was like listen, listen. I was like oh, wow, okay. And then he showed me his knee. He's like I can just push through it. I was like okay, uh, fair enough. So yes, it's um, don't worry, I won't worry about it. If my gp's anything to go by, you'll be fine, whilst you're fine, okay, alright but I would say this be careful when you bowl.
Speaker 1:Just be careful when you. I haven't been bowling for a while. When I'm older, I'm going to be older, you're going to be dangerous.
Speaker 2:You're going to be even older. Yeah, it's a dangerous game. Dangerous game, these bowlers.
Speaker 1:It's not much fun, though not too bad because I've got a weird technique so I kind of like use my wrist quite a bit, which is fine, which is fine for the initial through, you know, a few throws, but um, it takes a while, these big old balls of your wrist.
Speaker 2:Do you call it the banana peel technique? Is that what you call it? Is it the same kind of wrist action?
Speaker 1:Bananas are weird things, aren't they? I want to hear more about your wrist action Wals.
Speaker 2:That's all I want to know about right now. Tell us about your wrist. Action Think about holding a banana and think about your wrist action, Don't you? You just like to flick it Using your wrist. You like to flick the banana with your wrist.
Speaker 1:No, not the banana, the balls. Oh, you like to flick the banana?
Speaker 2:with your wrist. No, not the banana, the balls oh, you like to flick the balls with your wrist. The big bowling balls. Is that what you call them? Or is that what Georgie calls them? Oh, the big bowling balls.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the ones where you use three fingers.
Speaker 2:How do you hold your banana, walliams? I don't, you don't, you don't hold it. Is that why you've never peeled it? You just Big bowling balls and bananas and wrist actions and the innuendo just goes on. Oh, dear Two dad beans, silly Shall we move on from this one. Two dad beans.
Speaker 1:I was thinking what first, next, can I do? What have I done recently? Obviously I turned 40, but you know we don't want to bang on about that. I went away.
Speaker 1:I went away to North Cornwall very nice but there's not really many firsts such because I went there loads as a kid. So I went to an area which I've been to quite a bit, which I was on the border of Cornwall and Devon, so I used to do North Devon and North Cornwall quite a bit as a kid and it worked out well for us this time around, because when you've got a one-year-old travelling an hour and a half, you can do it in a nap window, whereas driving any further can be a bit a bit more of a mission.
Speaker 1:it's a test, I hear you I also hear you but um yeah, so a lot of the little things, a lot of places we've been would be a first, it'd be a second. Look, look, so obviously it doesn't meet the criteria of the podcast. It does not but I did have a first look at a place called Marsland Mouth A place on where sorry. Marsland Mouth.
Speaker 2:Marsland Mouth.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's a private beach which is actually owned by the Cadbury family, a little factory. They own quite a bit of that area, private beach which is actually owned by the Cadbury family. They own quite a bit of that area. And yeah, me and the dog went for a walk on ourselves one day and they went to Marsden Mouth and I fondled the border of Cornwall and Devon. So my first look, obviously I've looked at the border many a time as we've and spat across it or train or, you know, train through it. But um, no, I, I I straddled the border. So on the coast I did a walk with the dog, our, uh, our little chocolate rabbit, or little dog, big, big chocolate rabbit, and um, yeah, there's a nice bit of me and me and dog we're on a mission and, uh, we're not struggling find, find this, this place, and, um, yeah, there's a a little bridge with a little river, with a little cornwall sign, and I straddled the border of cornwall and devon very nice
Speaker 1:um, border of cornwall and devon. Very nice, um, yeah, but it is. I know you say it's weird and cool, but it's weird, it's weird. Oh, it is weird, yeah, it's, but it's weird because we went, obviously we were, we were as north cornwall as you could go, yeah, um, obviously I walked the border, um, so that shows how close we were to devon.
Speaker 1:But you go and do it and just all the sort of cafes and things. And we went to the valley which I've been to before and all the pictures of the um cream teas. They've all got the cream on first and so the jam on first and it's on all the pictures. You're literally five minutes in terms of. You know you're on one side of there and there's every single place just changes their photos of the cream teas to cream on first instead of jam on first. Obviously jam on first is the correct way. But anyway, it's just such a weird thing that all these cafes and things they know that they'll get such a backlash if they put their photos of their cream teas the wrong around well, I mean wells, this phrase is so it's a hot it's a hot debate down here, but it's just the fact that it is a hot debate, but we need to, you're literally on the borderline.
Speaker 1:yes, you might be on the devon side, but does it? I mean it does matter, but does it matter? It does matter. You just tell that they know that if they put the wrong photo down, they'll get, I don't know, arsed and attacked or something. Wow.
Speaker 2:I'm going to. We've been talking to this week. We've been telling the sun what's an opinion, what's a fact. And fact, cornwall is an odd place. I love Cornwall, but it's an objective observation that, having been to Cornwall, it is like you can tell why the people there wanted their own country. It feels like a different place. It feels even from it's a different culture.
Speaker 2:Yeah, different culture. I don't mean that in any negative way. It's a beautiful place. Everyone I know from Cornwall is amazing, lovely people who would give you their right arm if you asked for it. And Devon feels different to Cornwall. So when we were kids we came to Cornwall as well, but we primarily holidayed in Devon because it was only four and a half hours rather than seven and a half hours drive. I've got very fond memories of Devon, but when it comes to the cream tea debate you have to put the jam on first, like cornwall has that right. Like, I'm sorry, devon, you can come and you can shout at us, but you put the jam on first and then the cream on top. You look at the good stuff the jam's on. You can't put jam on top of cream, like horizontal, nice and smooth, and then the dollop of cream.
Speaker 1:How do you put something on top of a dollop? You can spread jam, whereas cream you dollop.
Speaker 2:You could spread cream, but you know you don't want to spread cream, you want to dollop of. You want to spread the jam and dollop the cream. You don't want to spread the cream and dollop the jam Like cream is. In terms of value, cream ranks higher than jam. So you put a layer of jam on and you dollop the cream, not the way and then give the yumminess of the yeah, I'm, I am with you on this one.
Speaker 1:I am with you in the fact that you know, yeah, let's just have it right just a little first look there and then also a first look the last week or so, so obviously the one-year-old was starting to watch some strange kids' TV shows.
Speaker 2:Have you moved on past, dougie?
Speaker 1:He doesn't like Dougie as much anymore, which is annoying.
Speaker 1:I like Dougie, I like hey Dougie, but hey Dougie doesn't seem to St attention but, um, we discovered a show that and and we're starting to get to a point of because I'm trying to avoid things like pepper pig and all that sort of stuff because I don't want to watch it. Yeah, that's fair. I've discovered this new show and I've tried it and I was like, oh, I don't really like it, but Logan seems to really engage with it and it's really weird. So it's, it's Baby Jake oh, baby Jake.
Speaker 2:Yeah, if you've heard Baby Jake. Oh, we watch Baby Jake a lot now. No, not now when, when Brayden was Baby Bray braden, you're watching your own time I'm weird, but not that I'm not I'm weird, I'm not. I've never killed a banana.
Speaker 1:Weird but it's a baby jake. That's really because and there's like just it's weird, there's like a song I'll sing it to you.
Speaker 1:I I've got the lyrics here, and there's this song that goes Yaki yaki yogi do do dee, ba, ba, ba, ba, be, bo see. Yaki yaki yogi, moo, moo, moo. And then it goes on, but. And then there's another bit where he goes ga ga, koo, gee, he's speaking, baby talk, mm-hmm. And on the show, isaac whatever he's called says he understands it. All right, which is fine, because it's a show. You can say what you want to say, but Logan seems to understand it. Of course he does, which is really weird. So have they actually done some science? And is there actually a baby language where?
Speaker 2:they actually. It's ultimately with the sounds, isn't it? I don't think it's language as such, it's just familiarity with sounds?
Speaker 1:Yeah, possibly, but I think they must have done some sort of research behind it because he engages with it quite a bit. And then there's, for those who have not seen it it's really weird and scary because you've got a real baby's head on top of like a cartoon. Yes, and it's really unnerving. And I don't know if you remember Mr Oshkiss, and he's really scary but nibbles the rabbit the little rabbit, yeah, and he's really scary but nibbles the rabbit the little rabbit, yeah, and he's really I don't like him. He sounds a bit like no, no, no huge eyes, and he just, yeah, he's weird. Okay, do you want?
Speaker 2:to hear us. A really weird fact, sure. So television program Baby Jake. So again anyone who?
Speaker 1:How old is Jake now then? So, well, Baby Jake is no longer a baby.
Speaker 2:So Baby Jake was first broadcast in the UK in 2011,. Williams, wow. So for our listeners who do not live in the United Kingdom, in the United Kingdom we have a TV licence. The TV licence is a legal requirement for anybody who owns a TV and it pays for the national television service known as the BBC. So the BBC are responsible for spending our, our license fee wisely. So baby jake on cbbs, which has been going for a long time. I mean, when you've seen this program, how much would you expect that kind of program cost to make?
Speaker 1:make. Well, it's good. Love animation, I mean the first, the first five minutes, is the same every single episode, every time, of the parents, the window. They've got 10 kids. These parents have got 10 kids as well, which is tv, yeah.
Speaker 2:Sponsored by Jurek. Baby Jake. Sponsored by Jurek.
Speaker 1:How much did it cost?
Speaker 2:How much would you expect to make that, based on what it is? Bbc taxpayers money? No, what do you reckon? 100 grand, 100 grand, okay, yeah, baby Jake has cost the British licence fee payer 1.85 million. That's cost. What do you mean To produce? Yes, it was funded by the Irish film board and CBBs. Someone had this wonderful idea to make Baby Jake.
Speaker 1:Which is fair enough if they actually done some scientific research behind the yaki yaki yogi. It means something.
Speaker 2:Do you want me to run you through the characters as well? Em, so you've got. Baby Jake, portrayed by Adam Batacci-Marini and vocal effects by Franco Bacacci-Marini, is the main character of the show. He's a playful baby who imagines many different adventures.
Speaker 1:He must be a teenager, isaac.
Speaker 2:You've got Isaac, Nibbles, Sidney, Captain Spacey, Pengi Quinn and Toot Toot.
Speaker 1:It's location is the Queen Mill, the Hamsternauts, which is a bunch of hamsters in astronaut costumes.
Speaker 2:Hamsternauts. So basically, 1.85 million has been spent on people getting stoned and coming up with random ideas the original series was made by Darren McQueen and produced and animated.
Speaker 2:Who animated and produced? Was made by Daryl McQueen and produced. Who animated and produced Elements of the program Through Jam Media. Jam Media, an Irish animation studio, also made Tilly and Friends, and Maddie Dowell Was quoted by the Metro as gaining inspiration For the show From watching her Seven year old nephew Understanding her One year old son. So there you go it's animated in Dublin. So it's an Irish program Funded by the BBC Costing us 1.85 million.
Speaker 1:For a load of random nonsense. It does come across as though someone's taken One million pound of that Budget and spent it on Guinness and drugs. Yeah, so that's what we need to do.
Speaker 2:We need to do an experiment where we get hammered and we'll come up with some ideas the know or know. We should make the no or no for kids. It can have his own show, we could animate him, he could be all fluffy and we can have the first lounge for kids this nibbles the rabbit is. You would see it in a horror film yeah, so instead of nibbles the rabbit, we have russell and we have, uh, milo, the two dogs, the big dog and the small dog, mika, mika, milo, what does that milo, mika?
Speaker 2:milo is the dog, and from the mask, yeah, I was thinking but when I said milo, I was thinking of the singer, because whenever I think of your dog, I think of that singer who sung um grace, who I know is called. Mika.
Speaker 1:Fat Bottom Girls, isn't it?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I don't know about Fat Bottom Girls.
Speaker 2:Big Girls. You're Beautiful, that's it, yeah, so I think of him when I think of your dog. So I don't know why I said Milo, anyway. Anyways, we've got Russell and Milo, and we've got the Know it or Know they do, and we've got mr hodgkins and mr williams, who are animated, and the uh, we do kids first looks. So first look at teething, first look at um teddy bears, first looks at, uh, you know um sleeping through the night, all these things we could, you know. Give us 1.85 million. Give us you know what. I'll tell you what. We don't even need 1.85 million. You know what? I'll tell you what we don't even need. 1.85 million. Give us 50 quid, we'll come up with this for you. Well, no, a bit more than that, 75?.
Speaker 1:No 100. Call it 100.
Speaker 2:500 grand, 500 grand to produce the First Look Gnomes TV series. Yeah, if someone gave us 500 grand to produce the First Lenten Arms TV series, I would absolutely give them a refund. But at the same time, go on, give us your money. Give us your money, we'll make it. We'll produce this, we'll get it animated. I'm sure we can find someone from university who does animation these days there's bound to be someone like Wes.
Speaker 1:The pre-charge is £400,000. First looks Craig anyone.
Speaker 2:I only have one, walliams. So I am getting to the age now where I'm like, what do I actually like to do? And I am becoming more and more of a? I'm a social creature, but I do like being at home and my son's getting older and, um, I like to spend time with brain now and some of the things we do together, uh, one of the things we do together is we play video games and we started to watch sport. Things we do together is we play video games and we started to watch sport. So, um, I have recently invested in for, for our enjoyment, a projector and a screen. So this is a first look as a projection screen. Now, this is a bit of a first look. Second look because I'm I was a projector boy, if you remember. Projector, projector boy, if you remember, projector boy, a projector boy, so one of these people who had, like, a home cinema room. I was one of those. So, about, I don't know what we're talking 20.
Speaker 1:Pardon, me sorry 2014, 2015,.
Speaker 2:I had like a home cinema room with a projector and I loved it. Then we moved to Belfast and we didn't have, you know, to have that kind of a room, you need space. When you have a kid, you don't have space. You have shit everywhere. So it's only now that we're like, oh, we have space again and we happen to have a bit of spare space. So I was like I'm going to go back and get me a projector and a screen. So I have recently purchased myself a projector screen for watching. Uh, so I'm looking forward to watching the usec fury fight coming up, which still hasn't happened.
Speaker 2:Um, and wrestlemania inspired me to do this. So what's wrestlemania this year? Um, I thought it was a great show and thought, oh, I'd like to. Actually, you know, we brain sit down and watch on a big screen, the big noisy room. And so I have. I have done the the one of the most stereotypical dad things of buying myself a projector, and I love it. I absolutely love it. It's like, considering it's just projecting a tv picture onto the wall. I'm like, forget all this ultra high definition, 4k nonsense. No way, the screen doesn't, the picture doesn't need to be that high quality, but when it's really big, it's just really cool. So yeah, projectors, dads and projectors, considering you can go and spend a thousand pounds on a TV, I would suggest now don't bother, spend a few hundred quid on a projector and make it big.
Speaker 1:I'm slightly opposite in terms of I had a projector.
Speaker 2:The wife got you one, didn't she for Christmas.
Speaker 1:Got me a projector and then we had a baby and then, well, a we haven't got time anymore, but B the way and where it is at the moment just doesn't work because it's just in the room, so we'll need to it doesn't work.
Speaker 2:When I said I had a projector, I used to be a projector boy. That was pre-responsibility and then exactly the same as you Child camera on, there's no point. You can't ever relax when you have young children. It's really hard to actually say you know what I'm going to put a film on and actually confidently say I'm going to watch the whole of the film. Films are like three hours.
Speaker 1:These days as well. You can't do it.
Speaker 2:You can't do it. But now Brain will sit down and watch a three-hour film with us, so it's quite cool. He's got to that bigger age and we'll play minecraft and like mario kart on a 98 inch projecting screen. It's just epic, especially when you've got kind of big speakers connected, so it's like the room is shaking with bass and mario is the size of your head and you're like this is this is awesome and like why would you ever want to spend money on this QLED, Ultra HD OLED TV nonsense for like two grand, when for
Speaker 2:like three or four hundred quid you can have a massive Mario and like just buy some cheap speakers. Like again, speakers are one of these things where you can get really again. Tip for dads Just go on Facebook or eBay and look at Tips for dads. Give me a new section, tips for dads. We could at Tips for Dads. Look at, give me a new section, tips for Dads. We could do a Tips for Dads section. Like you can get speakers. Speaker technology has not really evolved. So if you go and buy a set of speakers from 1995, I guarantee they'll still sound epic. So do not spend loads of money going and spending thousands of pounds on speakers when you can buy as good a quality speaker for half the price second hand um, I still remember the speakers my dad had when, when he was 40, yeah, and they were.
Speaker 1:They were epic speakers.
Speaker 2:Well, we, we had. So my old man gave me his old technic sound system um, from I'm talking like 1998 or something like that and phone a win with it. It still sounds absolutely incredible. So yeah, I'm just tips for dads. Big screen, cheap, big-ass speakers, dirty but as an experience, fantastic Home projectors, home cinemas, connected to your games, connected to Sky Sports, now TV feed plug in an Amazon 4K stick. Happy days, tips for dads.
Speaker 1:Tips for dads. This could be a new section. Yeah, so we're getting towards the end, so just a reminder. You know, write in, send us a letter. I'm not going to give out my address. Write in, send us a letter. I'm not going to give out my address, but send us a letter. Write an email to firstlitnomes at outlookcom. Dm us on Instagram. Don't visit the website. I still need to do that.
Speaker 2:I do still need. I've been very busy.
Speaker 1:I do need to do that and, yeah, five star rate us, leave us a review. That'll be good. Um, but before we go I think there's a rumor, because we do have some questions, as I've been sent in- hang on, hang on.
Speaker 2:Before you go any further, I just need to go for a quick pee. Hang on. Oh, hang on, hang on, hang on. Okay, I can hear someone coming upstairs volumes. Right, I'm going for a pee. I'll be back in a minute, okay.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, but there's someone coming up the stairs. There's someone. No, no, no.
Speaker 2:You sit down, make yourself comfortable. I'm going for a pee. You sit down. Talk to Williams. Oh no, hello, hey. Oh, no, hello, hey. How are you?
Speaker 1:daniel, oh good, thank you good good. We had some uh good feedback about you did you what was that then?
Speaker 1:on the on the fish pond of feedback, okay, what was it? Um, I don't remember what did they say? They said I believe they said something along the lines. So, yes, they said here we go to quote them also. I feel like the no or no is getting a hard time. I love him in his first appearance when he said he's having a poo, I nearly wet myself well, it's very nice, but you know it's uh I I appreciate that as a wise know-it-all gnome.
Speaker 2:Some people love you, some people hate you. You, the trick is not to take anything too seriously and, uh, get on with life. So thank you for that positive feedback.
Speaker 1:It makes me feel good um, there's a couple questions we've got for you. No name. Someone's got a question for us this uh, we've got two questions. It's the first question from bella. Bella says I'm currently stuck between a rock and a hard place. I would like to buy a home, but the market is crazy. Our landlord is kick us out. I don't know what to do for the best. Any advice for overcoming stressful situations such as this?
Speaker 2:that's a much deeper question than I expected, bella. Uh, I'm sorry that you're having to go through tough times and I appreciate you writing into the first look gnomes and I'll do my best to answer your question. In my experience, better. It can be difficult to navigate the property market and know what to do for the best, because putting your trust in politicians and what may be and he said, she said it's very difficult. So you sometimes question should you stretch yourself, should you be conservative, should you rent? And I would say these things all depend on your financial circumstances.
Speaker 1:But I would. Your voice dropped there.
Speaker 2:My voice dropped Is that better or?
Speaker 2:worse. Hang on, I'm going to peel this banana. I would say your financial circumstances should really guide your choices. I'd suggest sitting in a small house. Knowing you're safe is probably more important right now than sitting in a big house and worrying about how to pay for it. You have to remember, when you talk about homes, that home is any four walls that, more importantly, enclose the right people. It's not about the balls, it's all about the people inside of them. It's far more important to have love in a home than it is to have things and loads of space you just fill with junk. So, as a wise man would say, be safe, be grateful. As a wise man would say be safe, be grateful. As a wise gnome would say be safe, be grateful and love who you're with in the home more than the size of it or how pretty it is. Nobody needs financial burdens. You don't want to feel stress. So, small home, safe street, love the people who are in it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Question from Steve Bellsmith Hello.
Speaker 2:Steve.
Speaker 1:I'm getting excited about the Euros. Is it coming home?
Speaker 2:Oh, steve you've wrapped Scally and you asking a question like that in April. The Euros are still a few months away, but I must admit the squad that England have looks pretty good on paper. The question will really be for Mr Southgate can they stay fit? Can they come together? Can he instill a sense of pride that takes them to victory? If I needed, if I was a betting gnome which I'm not, whatever I was, I would say yes, it is coming home. That squad is too good to fail. If it doesn't succeed, I would suggest that mr Southgate is done. Succeed, I would suggest that Mr Southgate is done. Any manager worth his salt should be able to take that group of players and guide them to the semi-finals, the final and all the way to victory. So, yes, it's coming home.
Speaker 1:Hooray, I heard it here first listeners. Mr Hodgkins is havinga long pee, isn't he?
Speaker 2:He may be having a long pee, isn't he? He may be having a banana, who knows? Oh, hang on, I hear him now I better go, because this is his seat and he'll get annoyed with me if I don't let him have it back. It was lovely to see you. I will see you next time, or maybe the time after, depending on the feedback. Goodbye for now. Peace and love.
Speaker 1:Goodbye, nerds from Home. Peace and love, goodbye, bye-bye.
Speaker 2:Bye, hello, hello. The no All Known just went downstairs.
Speaker 1:Did you have a chat to him for a bit? Yeah, you missed him again. No, I saw him go down the stairs. Yeah, he wasn't here long. I had lots of questions about Piddle and things I didn't have a chance to ask him about.
Speaker 2:Oh well, that's alright, as long as he helped.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he answered some important questions from my distance. Well, that's good, that's good.
Speaker 2:I probably won't ever hear them and I won't remember talking about them. No, you won't remember anything. No, I probably won't remember anything, but I'm glad he was here to help. Well, on that note, William, it sounds like we're probably done.
Speaker 1:On that note, we're done, yes, so thank you very much. Email Go to the website. Dm us. Don't go to the website. Five star rate subscribe follow episode 6, season 2.
Speaker 2:It's going to be the season break soon, isn't it? We're going to be finishing for summer soon it's going to be the season break which means we're coming to the end of. Well, that won't, that won't no. September was it season break.
Speaker 1:Season break will be October.
Speaker 2:Ok, so we can get at least another two or three episodes in yeah well, yeah another six tune in listeners to hear what Williams has peeled for the first time.
Speaker 1:Next time, next time would it be an orange? Would it be a?
Speaker 2:kiwi tangerine. Would it be a kiwi? Will it be an orange? Will it be a Kiwi Tangerine? Will it be a kiwi? Will it be something as obscure as a starfruit?
Speaker 1:You can't peel a kiwi, can you? Of course you can. You don't need the skin. Well, you can't peel an Australian, can you?
Speaker 2:That's terrible Such a bad joke. On that note, I think we should call it quits On that note.
Speaker 1:I think we should call it quits. Call it quits. See you next month. Listeners.
Speaker 2:Bye.
Speaker 1:Yucky, yucky, yucky. Do do dee Ba, ba, ba, ba, bee bo see Yucky, yucky, yucky.
Speaker 2:Moo, moo moo. It's not for me, it's not for me, that one.
